Diary of a Kinky Librarian

I saw MasterDoc on Friday as usual. We spent the better part of the day doing mundane things – going out to IHOP for breakfast with his roomate, cleaning up the apartment, etc. I read for a while while he got some other things done. When he went out to do grocery shopping he asked me to put away some of his clean clothes. I was in a helpful mood and so I put them all away (just as easy to keep going once I started.) I also loaded up the dishwasher for another load without being asked. I was in a good mood. We got some cuddling in in between chores.

In the afternoon he put me on the sybian, sitting close in to hug me as I rode. It’s funny how something that includes a machine can be so intimate, but when you’re having the intense orgasms the sybian brings, and someone holds you, it’s just really intimate. I clutched onto him as I moaned and writhed. I tried my best to keep quiet and actually managed pretty well considering how loud I usually am. He’s trying to get me to come with less and less vibration from the sybian (I started off needing the high setting to get off).

We hung out some more, he used the heating pad on his back as it was bothering him again. He had me go down on him as he relaxed. I think I enjoy giving head even more now that I’m apparently improving. It’s always nice to get a good reaction for your efforts. It’s hot to make someone else feel good with your mouth.

That evening he had a woman come over to play who he had met once before. Roomate Liz made a delicious dinner for us all then left us alone after dinner. MasterDoc had me play with the little red vibrator on myself as part of the entertainment. Apparently our guest had really liked the magic wand when she tried it the week before, so MasterDoc had me go get it from the bedroom. He used it on me a little bit but unfortunately sometimes it irritates where I shave my pussy. We ended up going into the bedroom.

He gave our guest a ride on the sybian controlling the speed, and I went down on him at the same time. It wasn’t quite as much fun watching this woman as the last one because she kept her face down on the edge of the bed so I couldn’t watch her reactions. Supposedly she’s curious about women, but there seemed to be zero chemistry between me and her and so nothing happened. (Of course it would have happened regardless if MasterDoc had ordered me to do it, but he didn’t.) Next he put her down on the edge of the bed and fucked her for a bit. He had me get on the strap on and then have a go at her while he kissed and groped her.

They put me to bed after that (I had work in the morning) and they went off to the living room to play some more. In the morning, MasterDoc and I talked and I voiced my complaints about the evening – that I felt totally superfluous to the whole thing. He reminded me that sometimes he’s going to have me around just because he wants me there to serve him, and that I shouldn’t be so self-centered. It seems he thought I didn’t like the fact that I wasn’t the center of attention, but I later on pointed out to him that we had had a threesome with another young woman that I really enjoyed even though I wasn’t the center of attention. I felt I had a part to play in that. I felt like the third wheel in Friday’s situation.

I also pointed out that I hadn’t gotten to be fucked by him this week and that I had really hoped to do that. (It’s hard only seeing him once a week. If we don’t fuck then I know it will be another week before I even get the chance.) Ever the kindhearted Dom, he decided to let me off the hook with doing kitchen cleanup that morning, and he fucked me. But of course he put my collar on first and spent the time admonishing me about how I’m supposed to behave as his sub. When you’re in the throes of passion it’s easier to say, “Yes, Sir,” to everything that’s put to you.

I guess it’s as I’ve said before, there’s hard parts to being sub. I don’t get off on being there as simply an object or servant (some people do and boy I wish I was one of them). I suppose I’ll have to find a way to deal with that situation next time it arises. I was good enough to not raise the issue that night, I waited until we had time in the morning to talk so I did continue being sub while I wore the collar that evening. I enjoyed going down on him during the threesome, and playing with the vibrator on myself, but the rest of it, well I need to find away to eroticize it or something. I wasn’t attracted to the woman, so it was hard to derive enjoyment watching her, something I would have focused on ordinarily. While I’m an exhibitionist by majority, I do enjoy watching others get off. I’m sure I come off as such a whiny sub right now, but as I’ve said before, I don’t have to like everything he has me do, I simply have to do it. In the moment, I did what was asked of me and I did it without complaint. (I’ll never claim to be the perfect sub as I’m way too expressive about how I feel to ever be perfect at it. If someone else wants to play “subbier than thou” with me they can go right ahead. While I’m naturally inclined to be submissive, it’s also sometimes a challenge to me.)

I thought it might be interesting to have a round up of sex-related news from time to time. Today I read this article about how abstinence education doesn’t work (duh) but the conservatives behind it still insist it’s how sex ed should be handled. If abstinence-only education doesn’t prevent teen pregnancy, delay start of intercourse, or lessen the rate of STIs in teens, then what the fuck is the point to sticking with it? Are the people who back this total morons? The goals they want met aren’t being met by abstinence-only education. Isn’t the definition of insanity doing the same thing over and over expecting a different outcome next time?

Good news for men – ejaculations help prevent prostate cancer. Not just masturbation as the original report says, but frequent ejaculations of any kind help prevent prostate cancer. All the more reason for me to have sex with many partners – I’d be helping a whole bunch of guys fend off cancer. *grin* And guys, feel free to jerk off with impunity!

Steer clear of the Congo if you’re a guy. Penis thieves abound! Ok this story is just a bit silly but it fit in nicely to the theme of sex-related news. Thankfully in the US we don’t seem to have any sorcerers shrinking guys’ penises. I’m surprised there isn’t an uprising among the women in the Congo. I mean, I’d be pretty peeved if someone shrunk my man’s penis down to tiny size.

That’s all for sex news for today. Next post should be more sex and kinkiness as usual.

Friday night was my usual night with MasterDoc. His back had been bothering him earlier in the day so it was up in the air whether we were going to go out or not. (He had canceled with a couple who were supposed to come over so the wife could ride the sybian.) I had been keen to go out since the next couple of weeks are going to be more difficult for making plans (he’s working additional shifts). But of course I didn’t want him to be in pain. However, some time on the heating pad and he wasn’t feeling too bad, plus I offered to drive as driving really brings on the backache for him. We went out fairly late, taking my car for a change. (I drive stick and so few people know how to drive stick anymore, so my car doesn’t get used often for trips out unless I’m driving.)

We went to one of the swing clubs we frequent, and I’m very happy to report that they did away with the miserable air mattresses and have some actual beds now (still not fantastic but better than a friggin air mattress). The club was moderately busy and MasterDoc knew I was feeling really horny that week and that I was keen to be fucked. I’m a bit picky though, and for the most part I wasn’t too into the guys there. Now of course, had MasterDoc decided someone was going to fuck me, it wouldn’t matter one bit if I wasn’t interested in them, but sometimes he lets me give input. There was one man I thought was cute, but by the time I spoke up about this to MasterDoc he was nowhere to be found. *sigh* I need to speak up more quickly, although the thinking behind not speaking up quickly is that as the sub I don’t have a say in who I get to fuck so I leave it up to MasterDoc. He’s told me now, however, that I should consider it an order for me to speak up and tell him when I’m interested in someone.

We wandered around, seeing what’s going on. At the snack table a man recognized MasterDoc from another swing club years before. They chatted for a bit about people they had known from there. When we went off into one of the rooms, the man followed to watch. MasterDoc laid down on the bed and had me suck his cock for a while. A crowd soon formed and someone commented to him, “Your wife is very beautiful.” He asked me, “Are you my wife, slut?” And of course I responded with a clear, “No, Sir.” It felt really odd to be referred to as a wife when I’m simply his submissive slut.

I sucked his cock for a while, and he complimented me on my skills – apparently I’m improving. He had me get naked and suck his cock some more. When he decided to fuck me, I turned around and saw that the room was full of people watching. Of course I love this and it was so hot to be fucked in a room full of voyeurs. I was so horny and it felt amazing to have his cock inside me. I was moaning up a storm as always and I came close to coming. Of course I asked for permission and he didn’t give it right away. But when he did I had a lovely orgasm, screaming for all the crowd to hear. He spanked me for a bit, and my pain tolerance was up so it felt nice rather than painful.

Next, he had me reach into the pants of the man he was speaking to before and give him a hand job. He told me to make it my goal to make the man come. I used some lube and got him hard. I thought to myself that I really am a major slut, after all here was some guy who I wasn’t at all attracted to, but on MasterDoc’s orders I had no problem grabbing his cock and giving him a handjob. I even looked him in the eye a few times. Ultimately, I didn’t get him to come, but MasterDoc decided to fuck me again. Again, he fucked me hard and it felt so amazing. Again, there was a crowd watching. He let a couple of men grope me while he fucked me. I just love the idea of some guy thinking about the experience of groping me as he jerks himself off later that night. I love the idea of being fodder for someone’s masturbatory fantasies.

We spent some more time wandering the club, watching some action, talking to a few people. While a guy stood in front of me getting a blow job, MasterDoc told me to reach over and play with the guy’s ass. And so I did, groping some complete stranger who never even looked around to see who was playing with his ass. lol There were two girls playing who were really putting on quite a show. While I think I’m more of an exhibitionist than voyeur, I do enjoy watching others as well.

We hung out for a while and didn’t end up playing again. I was a little disappointed that I didn’t get gang banged, but ultimately since I had been fucked I was a happy girl. We headed home, stopping for some yummy bagels as usual.

The next morning, we fucked some more, MasterDoc warning me to keep quiet. It takes a lot of effort for me to moan quietly and not cry out. I managed it, mostly breathing heavy rather than moaning. He fucked me from behind for a while, smacking my ass from time to time. He fucked me while on top as well. I asked for permission to come and wasn’t given it.

We hung out for a bit then headed back to bed again. His back was bothering him so he lay on the heating pad again, but this time he decided that he wanted me to suck his cock while he relaxed. I threw myself into the blow job, doing my best to make him feel good. He got turned on enough to want to fuck me again, but as he was taking care of his back I had to get on top. I put the condom on him, trying to roll it down with my mouth after I got his sensitive head covered (only managed to roll it halfway with my mouth). I climbed on top of him and fucked him as best I could. It felt fantastic but I generally have a hard time coming while on top. It’s a bit strange because in that position my clit got some stimulation, but still I didn’t get close enough to ask permission to come. We fucked for a while, he pulled on my nipples as I rode, and he grabbed my head and pulled me down on top of his cock. It was hot and felt great. He smacked my ass with the crop and all went well until he accidentally smacked himself in the balls with the crop. Ouch. And that was the end of that.

We cuddled a bit and then I headed home. Unfortunately I won’t get as much time with him this week, but I’m happy just to get some time to spend with him at all.

I’ve fallen a bit behind in my blogging this week. Earlier this week I was a bad girl. Davey’s working long hours this week and suddenly with the spring weather I’ve been hornier. So what are my options? Either I force a tired Davey into having sex with me, or I ask MasterDoc for permission to masturbate. I found myself lying in bed on Tuesday night, horny as hell, and not feeling like getting up to call MasterDoc for permission (nor did I feel like getting up to try to seduce Davey, who was still up). I was so horny though and I gave into my desires and masturbated. I knew even as I did it that I would tell MasterDoc about what I had done, I wouldn’t compound the illicit behavior with lying or keeping a secret. While I was doing it, I noticed that everything felt extra intense because I was doing something I wasn’t supposed to do. Because it was forbidden I was extra excited. I had an intense series of orgasms, one right after the other, and then fell asleep.

The next day, I kept thinking about what I had done and how I was going to tell MasterDoc. I didn’t immediately regret my bad behavior but when I talked to him that evening and told him what I had done, the disappointment in his voice made me feel horribly guilty. To top it off, I was still feeling really horny and I wanted to masturbate again. Oh dear. I sent a text message to MasterDoc saying, “Should I even ask if I can have permission to masturbate tonight? I’m very sorry I didn’t ask last night.” I was relieved when he replied along the lines of, “I love you even when you’re bad. Call me right before you want to masturbate.” This still didn’t guarantee permission, but at least he wasn’t mad at me. He was heading out to a swing club with S. that night and he texted again, “It would be really hot to get that call while I’m out at the club.” I made a mental note to hold off calling until he was likely to be at the club.

When I called later, he said, “What you want to masturbate again? After you already did that last night? Are you lying in bed right now?” I said that I wasn’t, but that if he gave me permission I would immediately run off and do it. And something wonderful happened, he gave me permission. And I think that ultimately this was the best reaction to my behavior – that being punitive would have just made me feel more rebellious. But knowing that he cares about me even when I’ve stepped out of line made me feel all the more crazy about him. He had asked me earlier if I was testing him, and I don’t think it was conscious but perhaps unconsciously I was testing limits and seeing how he’d react.

And so I went off, this time getting out my bullet vibe, and came hard again for the second night in a row. If the neighbors walked by our door around that time they’d have thought Davey and I were having sex from all the moaning I was doing. *grin* I really got into it. The weekend was promising to be interesting what with how horny I was feeling. MasterDoc and I had plans to go out on Friday, and Davey would be home and better rested on the weekend.

I see submission as a journey… There’s always new things you discover about yourself. I’ve come to realize that I have a hard time consistently addressing MasterDoc as “Sir.” While it’s awkward to end everything you say with “Sir” I don’t think that awkwardness is the main reason. He’s often very lenient with protocol, but when he does decide I should stick to protocol I have a hard time doing it. I think part of it is that it’s kinda humiliating to have to address someone with respect every single time. It definitely puts you at a lower place than them. Every time I have to say “Sir” I’m reminded that I’m the submissive. (You’d think I’d jump on something that makes me feel like that, but it’s not always easy being sub to someone.) Sometimes it’s hard to get the word to come out. I think it also runs contrary to the way I was raised (not saying it’s not good to be respectful, after all my mother could have been loads more respectful of my father, it’s just not the example I was raised with).

So on Friday MasterDoc decided that I was to stick to protocol and I had a hard time of it. I think I ended up saying “Sorry, Sir” more often than anything else because I kept forgetting. By the end of the evening I was doing better, but it took a while and many reminders for me to get there. I’m definitely not a perfect sub, but then who is perfect? I have something to work on. Like I said, it’s a journey and every thing is a step along the path.

In the afternoon he decided to spank, flog and hot wax me. Unfortunately my pain tolerance was way down and every little thing hurt like crazy. He said he wasn’t even hitting me that hard but every strike hurt. I was moaning and whining a lot and thought I might start to cry. The idea of begging him to stop ran through my mind but ultimately I was able to stand what he dished out. It was definitely a challenge though. The wax stung and he commented that he could have used the really low melt candle my friend had at that party a few weeks before. I know that would have seemed hotter on Friday than it had that night at the party. Every little thing hurt. Sometimes my body is just so sensitive. After my butt was really sore and tender he had me roll over and he put my new nipple clamps (tweezer clamps) on my nipples. Again, I was really sensitive and as he pulled on the chain connecting them it hurt. He had me kneel again, and flogged me some more while the clamps were on. He had me sit up and he took the slapper to my nipples while the clamps were still on. Eventually, he had me lay on my back and he used the hitachi magic wand on me. It felt so good after all the pain and I moaned out a request to come. He got me right to the edge… and didn’t let me come. He said maybe later he’d let me.

We made dinner, my thighs stinging from some harsh slaps earlier. He had put my smartballs inside me at one point but unfortunately I didn’t feel them jiggle during spanking like I have before. He had me keep them in and I had them in all through making dinner and eating dinner. After dinner, I was allowed to take them out and we cuddled and relaxed for a bit.

MasterDoc was debating what to do with me next. He asked me if I wanted to be fucked or if I wanted to come. Of course that was an impossible question as I wanted both. I mean, it was really hard to choose one, I would have enjoyed each for various reasons. He made me choose, however, and I said I’d rather come. Of course, making this choice didn’t guarantee either. He had me suck his cock for a while and ultimately decided to fuck me. (Would I be allowed to come too?)

As he reached in the bag of condoms he found a female condom and decided we could use that. After all, he was out of water-based lube, and the female condom is made of polyurethane which can be used with oil based lubricants such as baby oil, which we used. I’m so used to using latex that I’ve very rarely ever used baby oil as a lubricant. (Safer sex lesson of the day: you can’t use oil-based lubricants with latex – it creates small holes in the latex. I used to think this is common knowledge until the time I was playing with my couple and they used baby oil on me and then thought the guy could have sex with me using a condom. Right. I set them straight.) The oil is more viscous than water-based lube. It felt nice. I wasn’t too keen on the female condom as the one time I had used one before I didn’t feel much of anything. This time, even though sensation was less than with a male condom, I still managed to enjoy it.

He fucked me on top and his hands caught on my hair as he positioned them on the bed, so I couldn’t move my head from side to side. I got really turned on. I could feel the outer ring of the condom rub up against my labia and clit. He fucked me like that for a little while, then we changed positions so that I was kneeling on the edge of the bed. Again, the outer ring rubbed against my clit and added to the sensations I was feeling. I wanted to come so badly. We stopped for a bit and when we resumed he was on top again. Now, I know he let me come at one point but as I write this I can’t remember if it was when he was on top or behind. So I was a lucky girl and I got fucked and I was allowed to come.

I slept well that night, and got up early for work the next morning.

Feminism and submission. I’ve talked about these two things before and I’m sure combined it’s a topic I’ll visit time and time again. I struggle with it, but not in the way that I find the two mutually exclusive. I don’t and I am comfortable with the fact that I’m a submissive feminist. However, I do wonder about how to explain this to the world. While I feel comfortable with both aspects of my personality, I don’t know how to explain why I’m comfortable.

As a feminist, I believe that women are equal to men. I believe that women should have the right to embrace their sexuality in whatever form it comes. But what happens when your sexuality isn’t politically correct? How can I say that women are equal to men when I choose to submit to a man? I think the answer lies in the fact that I’ve made choices. I’ve freely made decisions that work for me. I get totally hot submitting. I’m wired in such a way that kink turns me on. Ultimately, I don’t feel that my submission is about gender inequality – particularly since as a bisexual woman I’d gladly submit to a woman instead of a man if that’s who I ended up being with. I don’t feel that men are superior to me. I don’t submit due to any notion of their being superior. I submit because it gets me off. I submit because I feel comfortable and free being a submissive.

And as a feminist, isn’t it important that I stay true to my sexual expression? Being a Domme doesn’t turn me on. Being equal doesn’t turn me on (not like being submissive does). Being told what to do gets me hot. Giving up control is a choice I make. I have the luxury of making this a choice in my life because I live in a country where women are essentially free. (Oh sexism still runs rampant and affects women very deeply. I can see that clearly. I’ve seen it in my own life in various forms.) I continue to be a feminist and fight for the right of women to choose not to be submissive because the choice should be there, but why can’t I choose to be submissive? This post was inspired by a call for submissions for the Feminist Carnival of Sexual Freedom and Autonomy over at Labyrinth Walk. There, Meghan Rose asks, “Do we have a responsibility to all women through our sexual choices, or only to ourselves?” and therein lies my quandary. As a feminist, do I have responsibility to always exercise autonomy over my sexuality? It sounds contradictory, but in my submission I AM exercising my autonomy. Consensual power exchange makes me happy. I see the strength in submission. Subjugating your wants to serve people you care about is ultimately a part of life for most people, regardless of their sexual orientation. To be a parent you have to submit to the needs of your children. There’s strength in forgetting your wants and serving others – being selfish is far easier. I am a strong, intelligent, independent woman and choosing to submit requires the use of my strength and intelligence. I’m exercising my independence by choosing to submit in certain areas of my life.

Do I worry that being sub would be a bad example for young women? Considering the fact that I don’t exhibit signs of being a sub in public other than at play parties I don’t see that to be an issue. I’m not a 24/7 submissive, but some of the traits I exhibit while being submissive – being caring, thoughtful, of service and somewhat selfless (I say somewhat because being submissive is ultimately a selfish act for me as I get off on it.) are all traits I’d like to see instilled in any young person – male or female. Being a sub doesn’t mean you’re a doormat. Being Dom doesn’t mean being a selfish prick. A Dom and sub can be examples of how to be a decent person even within their roles. A good Dom/me takes care of their submissive and watches out for their well being, providing support and advice when needed. A good sub watches out for their Dom in subtle ways, making sure to do things just as the Dom likes and anticipating their needs. As in any relationship, both play their part to make the relationship mutually satisfying to both involved. Even within the equal relationship I have with Davey, I submit in little ways because I care about him. I make sure to do my half of the chores. I compromise to strengthen the relationship and make him happy (thereby making me happy in the process). We all make sacrifices for the people we care about, be they in a romantic/sexual relationship or a family/friendship one.

Being a sub doesn’t mean I’m a lesser human being. It just means I get off on pretending I’m lesser and giving over control to another person. I can still be a feminist and get horny being a sub.

This week I’m participating in Sugasm. (You can see a link to my Why I Enjoy Public Sex post below.) I really enjoyed “Need- Part II.”

The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #127? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set.

This Week’s Picks

Up Your Bum

“Now, every mainstream porn film seems to include anal sex as part of the sequence”

A Moment Captured

“Right now I am looking out down at the street from my window and my fingers have found their way to my soft wet labia.”

Things Every Man Should Own/Know/Hear

“You can also give the controller to her, or use it yourself, and play with the power of the vibrations.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself (one from the vaults)

The New York Times’ Best Porn Articles

Editor’s Choice

Feminist Carnival of Sexual Freedom and Autonomy #1

More Sugasm

Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

(Sugasm participants should re-post all the links above within a week. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above links.)

BDSM & Fetish

Coming Over

Counting the days

How Much Pain Can You Take?

Kinkfest 2008 Report

Need – Part II.

Piss off

Pride Cometh

The Punishment List – F/m Spanking Video

Spanking and wanking

Subordinate, me

Thoughts on Sex and Relationships

Fear of Rejection

Let’s talk about being bi

Sally Kern Does NOT Speak For Me (Redux)

When it all went horribly wrong…

Why I Enjoy Public Sex

Why Marriage?

NSFW Pics, Videos & Audio

Blonde MILF is pounded hard in Gangbang

Grenian | Cikita

Pornsaint Nico Elise

Sexy Brunette Domino

Vanessa – Flower Power

Sex News, Reviews & Interviews

April Is Orgasm Month!

Catalina loves The Bondage Awards

Chanta Rose Dominates Mz. Berlin And Sabrina Fox On Chanta’s Bitches

eXcessica! (Calling All Writers…)

Fetish Model Wenona In Predicament and Suffocation Bondage on Water Bondage

Kicking Consent at Podophila

Some Positive News for Camgirls

Spray-On Condom in a Can

Weighting for a Great CBT Toy

Sex Work

The Dirty Nasty Truth

One Week Later…

The Porn Dilemma – Sometimes Forums Make Me Mad

Erotic Writing and Experiences

Captivating the college girl part two

Crush

Filling her up with my fingers

Garden Variety

Mine

My New York Indiscretion: The Conclusion

Twisted Tongue Dreams and Tongue Twister Scenes

I had a busy weekend, spending pretty much all my time with MasterDoc. (Davey had a date on Saturday.) On Friday, I spent time with both of them, however and we had another threesome. Yet again double penetration did not come together. This time it wasn’t our goal but in the heat of the moment decided to give it a go. It’s been so hard to get the right angle so that they both can be inside of me at the same time. I got on top of MasterDoc and Davey tried to get in my ass. I tried getting on top of Davey with his cock in my ass, still no luck. Still, I was well-used that night. They both took me anally and vaginally. I got well fucked and came. I was a very happy slut. I had two cocks to put in my mouth, two cocks to put in all holes really. I just wish I could have had two cocks inside me at once. We’ll try another time in another configuration.

My sluttiness continued through the weekend, although not in a fucking sense. I had my period so a swing club was out. (Lately the instead cups leak a fair amount. My flow has gotten heavier. *sigh* It’s really annoying, not to mention messy.) After spending a quiet day together MasterDoc took me out to the local bdsm club. I’ve been there before but not for ages, and not with someone who’s my Dom before. We generally give it a pass as we both like our bdsm with sex involved, and you can’t have penetration at this club. (What fun is that?) But as my pussy was semi out of commission, a sexless beating sounded like fun. I got a few quick spanks – one over his knee and one bent over a table in the lounge area. MasterDoc always likes to have an audience. (Yeah, like I don’t. *grin*) Unfortunately when we got around to stringing me up with my arms suspended there wasn’t much of a crowd left. Still, it was intoxicating to have him beat me in public, my pants pulled down and my tits bare. He put clothes pins on each nipple for a bit and it really pinched. Still, I felt all hot and tingly down below despite – or perhaps because of – the pain. Yes, I think it was because of the pain. He flogged my butt and back. He stood in front of me at one point and used a vibrator on my clit. Then he proceeded to spank me hard on my ass while telling me to focus on the vibe tickling my clit. It was really hard to focus on the good feelings when the spankings were quite hard. I cried out but I never once begged him to stop. (I’m to beg if it’s too much for me to take.)

We took a break after, and someone who knew him from his past visits to bdsm clubs came over and spoke to him. This guy is a foot fetishist and MasterDoc let him give me a foot rub. It wasn’t your ordinary foot rub, however, he put my feet on his face, rubbing up against them. He had me push back against his face with my feet as hard as I could. He led one foot down to his cock and had me stroke it with my foot while the other foot was on his face. He certainly seemed to be enjoying it. And for the most part it felt nice, even if not stimulating for me personally. It tickled like crazy when he put my toes into his mouth – one whole foot at a time. He played with my feet for several minutes before MasterDoc decided that was enough. He took the time to put my socks and shoes back on, kissing my feet before covering them up. This is my second experience with a foot fetishist, although the first one was sorta uptight so he merely massaged and smelled my feet. It feels nice to have someone lavish attention on your feet, but I tend to think feet are kinda icky myself so I don’t fully understand the attraction. But we’re all wired differently, and there are plenty of people who can’t understand my attraction to being spanked and beaten. Vive le difference!

Next body part to be worshipped – my ass. We encountered a man in a back room of the club and he offered to worship my ass. So now not only have I won a best ass contest, but I’ve had my ass worshipped. He got on his knees behind me and pressed his face against my ass. I could feel him breathing hot and heavily through the fabric of my pants. He pulled the waistband of my pants down slightly so he could stick his tongue in my crack. Again, MasterDoc decided when it was enough and the man thanked both of us for the experience. It was kinda surreal. I’m glad there’s a place where all of us sexual deviants can find people to let us indulge our kinky fantasies. I’m glad I’ve met someone whose fantasies often line up with mine.

We got home late and went to bed. The next afternoon MasterDoc woke me with breakfast in hand. (Bagels, yummy.) He decided that he’d like to leave bruises on me and so I was to be beaten some more. I haven’t bruised much in ages, I seem to be getting a tougher skin, much to my disappointment. I think there’s a little bit of bruising now but I’ll have to check in the mirror. My butt is still feeling sensitive after the beating. Before the beating, he had me fuck him with me on top for a while. Then he took me over his knee and spanked me quite hard. I cried out in pain and buried my face into the mattress to muffle the noise. Just when I’d think that I might have to beg for mercy, he’d take a break and I’d feel like I could handle it again. The slaps stung and he went at my ass for a few rounds. Interestingly, as usual I got really wet from the spanking.

He had me stand over the edge of the bed next, bent over. He used his hands, the crop, the new slapper I bought, including the other end which is a mini-whip. The whip part stings like crazy. When he said that he was going to take me I was excited as a good fucking would only add to how hot I was feeling. He fucked me and spanked me a bit while doing so. I was in heaven. He let me lay down and rest for a little while after that, my butt smarting. I heard him go into the bathroom and I felt relief when he took a pee – that meant he wasn’t going to pee on me today.

We both showered and then we fucked some more. This time my butt was on a pillow on the edge of the bed and he fucked me standing up. His cock felt so good that I begged to be allowed to come. After a brief moment, he allowed me and I came, screaming out. I’m surprised my muscles didn’t push him out as the orgasm felt really intense. I found myself grasping at the blanket on the bed while in the throes of orgasm.

Thanks to my period, there was some cleaning up to do and so we cleaned up. We spent some time cuddling and whatnot until he decided that I was going to help him come. He put some porn on his laptop and got comfortable. I played with his ass while he stroked his cock. He gave me direction so that I’d do a better job of it. He decided that he wanted to fuck me again and he put me on top of him. I love how he’d grab my hair and head and push me down onto his cock. I was moaning like crazy, telling him how good his cock felt. After a while he decided that he’d had enough, and we resumed our previous activity. I played with his ass until he came.

By this time it was dinner time and so I went home. Davey and I had dinner out, but after dinner I decided to go for more fucking. Davey and I fucked some more, this time dispensing with the damn instead cup as it wasn’t sitting in the right place. He grabbed my hair in a most pleasing way and fucked me hard. So ultimately, I spent the better part of the day fucking. All in all a most pleasant (and pleasurable) day.
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A very special thanks to Kaya from Under His Hand for giving me a reciprocal link. A lot of people have come by since then to check my blog out.

Generally, the more I blog the more I think of things to blog about. Today at work I had a random thought that I should blog about why I like public sex. But of course, before doing that I have to think about why I like public sex. I don’t think I’ve ever really thought about it, not in depth.

I’ll start off thinking about how I feel when I have public sex. Again, not something I’ve thought much about other than “it feels good.” But somehow, when there’s an appreciative audience, everything is a bit more intense. I don’t know why it should be that way, but I get off harder knowing that people are watching me and feeling turned on. Perhaps it’s a channeling of the energy that’s around. Their arousal fuels mine. Knowing that I’m making dicks hard is also a real self-esteem booster. I may be an average-looking chubby chick, but seeing my naked tits and wet cunt gets many men hard and horny. It’s arousing being arousing.

There’s also a thrill to be had in doing the taboo -you’re not supposed to have sex in front of others. I’m a bad girl for letting people see me naked and fucking. I find it actually quite liberating to break that taboo. There’s something freeing in being naked and not worrying about your body, but instead taking pleasure in it. For those moments I’m free from society’s fat-hatred because I’m not thinking about how I need to lose weight, but I’m thinking about how tingly my clit feels and how hot and horny I feel. I’m thinking about how hot the person fucking me finds me. And how some of the others around him wish they could be him. I think about how good my wet cunt feels – both to me and to the person I’m fucking. I think in having an audience I’m somehow more present in the moment and present in my body. I’m more aware of the sexual energy being generated. At that point in time I am hot because I feel so damn hot.

And knowing how hot it is to watch another woman come, I’m sure it doesn’t hurt that I know I give a noisy show when I come. There’s something terribly arousing about seeing someone orgasm. And it’s arousing being the person who others are seeing orgasm. It just adds to the hotness of the moment.

So why do I like public sex? It’s just generally hotter for me than private sex. The element of an audience adds something. Private sex is plenty hot in itself, but I love me an audience.