Archive for the 'blog' Category

NYC Sex Bloggers Calendar Party

Much name dropping lies ahead!

MasterDoc and I went to the calendar party last night. I have to give him a special thanks as he was so kind to get me there by the time the doors opened - despite horrific traffic. So we got gift bags from Babeland and were among the first people in the door. (And the people standing in line outside waiting for the doors to open.)

I had been in touch with Lilly before the party and I knew she’d be just inside the door handing out bags with Bad Bad Girl. So even though I’ve scarcely seen a picture of her before I recognized her as I came in. The gift bags went fast and the place was packed throughout the night.

Diva came over and introduced herself to me. I’ve been chatting with her on twitter so it was nice to put a face to the name. I bought some raffle tix from her in the hopes of winning something like the rolling toy trunk from For Your Nymphomation or the Njoy Eleven, or the Njoy Pure Wand. *sigh* I didn’t win any of those but later walked out with a NaughtiNano, a vibrator which plugs into your iPod. I soon got to meet Tess as well and even got to touch her tits as promised in the promotion for the party.

MasterDoc and I had drinks and relaxed while the party got started. I went off in search of where to pick up my calendar, as well as saying hi to Audacia Ray and have her introduce me to Vera from For Your Nymphomation. (I will be reviewing something from them shortly. Can’t let you know about it yet, though!) I wanted to meet Vera because, if you follow my twitter feed you know, we had a misunderstanding via twitter. It is impossible to get the tone of a message through the internet and I took her message to be snarky in tone, when that’s not what she meant at all. We have long since made up and she was kind enough to give me a prototype necklace they’re working on. I’ll wait to tell you all about it when Vera says they’ll become available. But it’s very nice (just like something I wanted from Tiffany’s) and will be reasonably priced (unlike the necklace from Tiffany’s).

I had loads of stuff and bags in my arms by this time, and the place was getting very crowded, so MasterDoc and I took a walk to his car to put things away and to get some air. It was a lovely night in NYC last night - unseasonably warm. We shared a falafel at the place next door to the party and then went back in. I asked Lilly to introduce me to Catalina, as I hadn’t recognized her as of yet. It’s fun to walk up to someone, have them look at you wondering who you are and then reach out a hand and say, “I’m Nadia, the kinky librarian,” and have them smile and know just who you are. It was great to meet Catalina too (she of the oh so many blogs). She introduced me to Dimitri from Vibe Review, who I started being an affiliate with a short while back. (Between them and Babeland I don’t think I need to look around for more places to buy my sex toys.) Social spaz that I am it took me a moment or two before I introduced MasterDoc. Catalina said, “Ohh,” took one look at him and said, “You don’t look kinky!” I think that works to his advantage. He looks like a nice Jewish doctor you can take home to mother, but really he’s a very perverted man. (I’m so lucky to have him for my Dom!)

So yes, it was a busy night meeting a lot of people, with some time spent hanging out with MasterDoc as I’m not always the most sociable person in a room. My friend Mina was supposed to be there but I missed her if she was. I kept an eye open for divasub and her boyfriend/Dom but if they were there I didn’t see them either. I saw Rachel Kramer Bussel, who I’ve met once or twice before but I doubted she would remember me. (One time she was working the door at an all-women play party I went to. And I’m not sure I met her more than that one time. I once, a few years back, had a sexual dream with her in it, and she caught wind of my blog entry saying so and she mentioned it on her blog. Between her and Essin’ Em I’ve had two sex blogger sexual dreams. lol)

We also ran into the bartender from the swing club we visited on Wednesday night. She grabbed my butt and I turned around to see who had done it. I was happy to see it was a cute woman but it took me a second to recognize her out of the context of the club. MasterDoc and I were going to go to the other swing club last night, but we opted to go back to the one where the bartender worked. We had a nice time hanging out there after the party, but we didn’t do a lot of playing. We had a couple of drinks when we got there and MasterDoc, who doesn’t drink much at all, felt the alcohol so we had to hang out until he felt sobered up again before playing.

We ended up in the back S&M room as usual. We spooned and he slid his hand under my tights into my panties to play with my pussy. It’s funny how even though you couldn’t see anything with his hand down my pants, there were still single guys who were eager to watch. He had me take my tights and panties off and he played with me some more. He slapped my thighs, and again my pain tolerance was pretty decent thankfully. He had me suck his cock for a while, which I really enjoyed. He asked me which would I prefer - being beaten or getting fucked. I think I surprised both of us when I said I’d rather have the beating. (I wasn’t really feeling horny last night, I think MasterDoc wasn’t either.) He had me lay on my stomach and he spanked me a little bit, then he had me get up on the spanking bench.

He went to town on my butt, using slapper, flogger(s), and his hand. He told me to play with myself and kept asking if I was wet. Unfortunately I just wasn’t getting wet last night. I think he planned to fuck me on the bench but ultimately that didn’t happen. We soon got dressed and hung out some more before deciding to leave for the night.

Why I Blog

In his essay,  “Why I Write,” George Orwell lists the reasons why anybody writes:

I think there are four great motives for writing, at any rate for writing prose. They exist in different degrees in every writer, and in any one writer the proportions will vary from time to time, according to the atmosphere in which he is living. They are:

(i) Sheer egoism. Desire to seem clever, to be talked about, to be remembered after death, to get your own back on grown-ups who snubbed you in childhood, etc., etc…..

(ii) Aesthetic enthusiasm. Perception of beauty in the external world, or, on the other hand, in words and their right arrangement. Pleasure in the impact of one sound on another, in the firmness of good prose or the rhythm of a good story….

(iii) Historical impulse. Desire to see things as they are, to find out true facts and store them up for the use of posterity.

(iv) Political purpose - using the word “political” in the widest possible sense. Desire to push the world in a certain direction, to alter other people’s idea of the kind of society that they should strive after.

I can see these four impulses in me when I blog. Certainly, something every blogger hopes for is to become known, to have a lot of readership, to get linked to from bigger bloggers’ blogs. We want to feel like we’re important, popular and that people want to read what we have to say. I wasn’t very popular when I was younger, and certainly I can see the desire to be popular has never completely gone away. So we’ve got egoism - check.

While I’m not a phenomenal writer, I do take delight in a well-turned phrase, in a sentence that captures the moment so perfectly. I love when I’ve created a record of a wonderful time in my life, or used the blog to express difficult feelings. I like being able to go back and remember where I’ve been and what (who) I’ve done. And so we have aesthetic enthusiasm and historical impulse.

The fourth is certainly very clear on this blog - I want to promote healthy sexuality, STI awareness and understanding of alternative sexualities. I want to open up people’s minds to sex positivity. There’s way too much negativity and fear in sexuality in the United States, I hope to be one of the many voices that help change that.

Orwell’s long been one of my favorite writers, and I think he really hit the nail on the head with this one.

Odds and Ends

Yes, I’m being slowly sucked into this affiliate thing - I’ve just added Vibe Review as an affiliate in the sidebar. (I deliberately chose one of their banners without sexy imagery as someone, Jess, I believe, said that the nekkid pics would make it hard to view with her children around.) I’ve never shopped with them so I really can’t speak about their customer service. Truth be told, I’m hoping they offer toys to review. I haven’t made a dime off the Babeland affiliate thing yet, so I figure I’ll see if I can get paid in sex toys. I have two more toys coming from Babeland shortly.

I’ve seen on other blogs where the author answers questions from readers, and I wondered - does anyone have any questions for me? Any sexual philosophies you want me to wax poetic on? Leave ‘em in the comments and I will answer what I can. (Of course I reserve the right not to answer something!) I’d like to write some entries that are more about sex and bdsm theory and knowledge than just the wonderful things I get up to. I can’t see MasterDoc all the time, so I need something to keep me writing in the interim. (Anything you’d like to see me write about, MasterDoc?) I chatted via my digsby widget the other day with a nice young Brazillian woman looking for advice on anal sex (lots of lube! take your time!). I’m quite prepared to act as the Ann Landers of sexuality. And being a librarian, I may just cite references! I don’t have any formal education in sexuality, but I do have lots of experience (yes, the girl is a slut) and have read widely on the subject.

To Be Announced… New Site

I’ve decided that my new hobby will be making a website for this blog. I’ve purchased a domain name (to be announced when there’s something there to look at) and site hosting, now I just have to figure out how the hell to make something of the space. (Special thanks to my pal the Curmudgeony Librarian for letting me know I should pay extra for private site registration.) I’m quite the newbie when it comes to web design. Many moons ago, my first blog was a site I coded myself. Er, well, when I say coded myself I mean I stole the code from a friend’s blog and modified it using what I learned from a book called something like “Teach Yourself HTML 4 in 24 Hours.” Yes, this was back in the wild days before blogger and other convenient blog programs. (Or if they existed I didn’t know it.) I didn’t know the term blog, in fact, it was just my “online journal.” Not very exciting stuff as I blogged under my own name. The site was pretty basic. Each entry had to be a new page I created and manually linked to the page before.

I’ve bounced around blogging platforms a little and I like Blogger best for the ease of use, even if it is now owned by evil Google who stores all your information indefinitely. (I find LiveJournal to be hopelessly complicated. Vox was ok but who the hell uses it? I forget the rest I’ve tried.) But now I’ve decided to make life difficult for myself. *chuckle* I’ve downloaded two things that might help me - Movable Type (if I can figure out how to install it) and Nvu (an open source WYSIWYG editor I have yet to figure out how to use). I’ve got a 30 day trial of Photoshop Elements to do the graphics on (so far the most fun part and the part I know the most about doing!). This will certainly be a little adventure. I’ll post developments here when there are any. My web host provides a site editing program but none of the templates are really satisfactory.

Anyway, I’m going to go enjoy my once-a-week-masturbation-without-permission session and then get to work installing Movable Type to see what it can do. Wish me luck! Any web geeks out there willing to give me advice when I need it? (Curmudgeony and D.S. are good for that.)