Archive for the 'D/s' Category

“He gave them pain like balm, and they begged him for it”

Published
by
Nadia
on June 24, 2009
in D/s, bdsm, embarrassment, masochism, piss play, porn, sadism, sex, sex toys, spanking and submissive
. 1 Comment

I’m reading a fantasy novel right now, suggested to me a while back by my friend Divasub. It’s called Kushiel’s Dart by Jacqueline Carey. I’ve just come across the bdsm themes in the book, and now understand why she recommended it to me.

“Alone among angels, Kushiel understood that the act of chastisement was an act of love; and the sinner in his charge too came to understand, and loved him for it. He gave them pain like balm, and they begged him for it, finding in it not redemption, but a love that transcended the divine.”

This flowery prose seemed lovely to me when I read it this morning. Last night MasterDoc was wonderfully dominating and it was so what I needed.

At the start of the evening, we went looking for porn online and found a librarian porn video. I can’t find the link to it now, unfortunately. (UPDATE: MasterDoc gave me the link.) It was very amateur - just one camera angle. But the “librarian” (I think her glasses were meant to identify her as a librarian) wore a collar and wrist and ankle cuffs. There was a definite bdsm overtone to the video. And while going down on the guy, she put her hands between his legs to massage his inner thighs - just like I do with MasterDoc! We laughed and wondered if perhaps someone was inspired by our hijinks.

We tried out my new ceramic vibe. Unfortunately it was not as wonderful as I had hoped. I will review it later. I grabbed the acuvibe mini when told to get another toy and I used that to bring myself just about to the edge of orgasm. MasterDoc then had me stop, bend over the liberator scoop, and he fucked me from behind. He’d spank me every so often. It felt great and I wished that he’d let me come like that. He stopped, and started spanking me with my new crop. When that didn’t seem to be as hard as he’d like, he started spanking me with his hands. It went from painful to incredibly hot. I was on the verge of orgasm (he had me play with my clit at the same time) when he started hitting harder. He told me to come, but the pain had just crossed the threshold from stimulating to painful, so it took me a few seconds to be able to come. But I did manage. I’m surprised I didn’t squirt.

We took a break, and then he had me get on top and ride him. My knees were worn out from exercising earlier in the day, but I managed to ride for a while. I got close to orgasm, and he helped me along by asking if I was ready to come, “Right now.” Often, even if I’m not quite to that point his asking me that will put me on the edge. He told me to come, and I came. While I was coming he said, “Come now cunt, and I’ll piss on you when you’re done.” I decided that I had better enjoy my orgasm while I could, and I came really hard. I hoped that he had been just threatening the pissing. And as we cuddled after I thought perhaps that was the case.

I went to get ready for bed, and when I came back from the bathroom, he was holding my collar. “Put this on,” he said, “And come with me.”

He led me back to the door of the bathroom. It was clear that he hadn’t forgotten or threatened idly when he said he was going to piss on me. He told me to get in the tub, on my knees, and if the tub was cold well that was just tough shit. I did as I was told, wincing at the idea of what he was going to do to me. He made me say I was ready, and made me say that I wanted him to piss on me. I clenched my eyes shut as I couldn’t bear to look. He started to piss on me, and with my eyes closed I could sorta block out what it was, and just enjoy the feeling of warm liquid running over me. I could ignore the faint odor of urine and pretend it wasn’t pee. He told me to hold my tits up. I didn’t react fast enough and he ordered me to do it again. I did as I was told and he pissed all over my tits. The piss ran down my body and I was fairly drenched in it by the time he was done. I tell you, he had to have been saving that up all evening. It seemed to go on a long time.

I was feeling humiliated and stunned afterwards. He told me I could rinse off and he was kind enough to get me a towel to dry off after. I carefully rinsed myself off and patted myself dry. I found that I really needed a hug after that. Humiliation play can be pretty intense, and while I like it I definitely need a hug and reassurance of some sort afterwards. I found that while piss play was every bit as humiliating as I would imagine, I didn’t freak out or fall apart from it. Of course, I don’t know that I would have been so composed if he had pissed in my mouth.

While in theory I don’t like piss play, I have been craving some serious domination lately, and this really fit the bill. I wouldn’t let anyone else piss on me. Only he has that power over me.

I slept soundly last night. And a few minutes after waking I remembered, “Oh jeez! He pissed on me last night!”

Thoughts on Porn

Published
by
Nadia
on June 17, 2009
in D/s, Uncategorized, bdsm, blow jobs, horny, kink, porn and sex
. 0 Comments

Last night, MasterDoc and I watched some porn as usual. When I’m put in charge of selecting porn I generally pick something from kink.com. Last night, he made the selection, and it was a vanilla group sex porn. Now, I find group sex a turn on, but I wasn’t especially turned on by the porn last night. It took me a while to get worked up, even when I was already on top riding him - and he had played with my pussy for a while, which I enjoyed. I wondered why it was hard for me to get into the sex. (Besides the fact that this was the worst porn I can recall seeing.)

It dawned on me, in the kink.com videos the women are engaged in the sex/kink they’re having. It’s hot because you’re watching something real happen. Now, not all vanilla porn is staged, but I find that the women seem like they’re faking it much more often in vanilla porn. And it’s the fakeness that turns me off. It’s much easier to fake vanilla sex - just lube yourself up and get fucked while making moans of supposed ecstasy. But when you’re being dommed your brain is engaged with the situation as well as your body. And that’s fucking hot. So I don’t think it’s just because I’m a kinky mofo that I prefer kink porn, I think it’s also the degree of engagement in the female performers. I want to watch hot sex - not people going through the motions.

It also helps that kink.com is known for being ethical and respectful of their performers. (Now if they’d only branch out into models with different body types, we’d be set.)

I did manage to get into things and have a great orgasm - and for the first time (?) in recollection I had to stop coming to catch my breath. MasterDoc was amazed.

After the first round of sex I got to select the next porn, and of course I put on something kinky. We cuddled and watched that for a while. He had me put a condom on him in preparation for the next time and told me to suck his cock hard. (The condom deadens sensations a little, so I can get much rougher when he has a  condom on.) I threw myself into sucking his cock roughly. Then MasterDoc put me on my knees on the liberator wedge at the edge of the bed. The wedge put me up just high enough for the penetration to be perfect. Oh god, did I get into the fucking that time. My moaning at times like that must be so animalistic. I feel amazing and struggle to hold back from coming. When he let me come I came long and hard.

I fell foward when he told me to, and caught my breath. I really felt like a cuddle would be nice, but MasterDoc’s phone rang while we were having sex so he checked it and had to get back to someone right away. Instead of sulking or getting cranky, I decided to be patient, and then when he was available to state my need - a cuddle. And of course I got the cuddle I needed. I went to bed last night feeling happy and wishing my time with MasterDoc could last even longer.

Lately I find myself longing to be in my collar and being submissive. I miss when MasterDoc and I would do shows for people. We’ve fallen into a bit of a rut sometimes - although it’s understandable since MasterDoc has been sick and had back issues as of late. There are some days when I long for him to do something to me which I detest, just so I can feel turned on by his control over me. I long for an extended period of pain before sex. I’m a kinky mofo indeed.

Not Another Play-by-Play

Published
by
Nadia
on June 11, 2009
in D/s, Uncategorized, bdsm, blog, blow jobs, dom, emotions, masochism, musings, orgasm denial, sex, spanking and submissive
. 0 Comments

As I sit down tonight to write about the fantastic sex I had last night, I think of how some days I get bored writing about sex. Mind you, I don’t get bored having sex. But some days it feels like I say the same thing over and over here, “Blah blah blah, penis in vagina, blah blah blah, moan, writhe, pant, gasp, blah blah blah, not allowed to come for a while, blah blah blah, amazing orgasm.”

Again, I repeat that doing all this isn’t the least bit boring. Oh no. It’s fantastically exciting. But writing about it some days makes me wanna snooze.

So instead of a play-by-play, I’m going to reflect here on some thoughts I had last night and some moments that were particularly hot/intense. We had sex twice, my collar was on, although even when we forget to put my collar on I fall into sub mode when we have sex. MasterDoc is pretty relaxed when my collar is off, but there’s the understanding that even without my collar sometimes there’s times where my added respect is warranted. For example, when he gives me a direct order. Or when we’re getting down and dirty in bed. That’s when I either put in the “Sirs” myself or he reminds me. I know that some people always call their Dom or owner “Master” or “Sir” but I’m very happy to be in a more relaxed relationship. I do, however, have to work harder on making use I use the honorific “Sir” when my collar is on. As much as I love submitting to him, I can have a hard time with remembering “Sir.”

I’m only human, and some days/moments submitting is hard. I don’t feel like doing what he’s asking of me, or I’m cranky, or I’m feeling rebellious. But sometimes, things are just the opposite. Last night I was delighted to submit to him, delighted to wear the collar. Being his sub felt so right. I didn’t want to take the collar off. I felt so happy and thankful that my submissive side has been fulfilled by this relationship with MasterDoc. I’ve never had a D/s relationship before, I’ve only played prior to this, but it feels so good.

And not only does it fulfill a part of me, submitting is also incredibly hot. I kept thinking last night how the fact that whenever he wants a blow job, he can just tell me to do it and he gets one - this is really hot. Vanilla guys have to sometimes persuade their girlfriends to blow them, a Dom merely requests what he wants and get it. And that power is sexy. The fact that he controls my orgasms makes my arousal more intense. I had a blissful period of time last night, when I was on all fours, hugging a pillow and being fucked from behind, where I was in such ecstasy and yet such tension wanting to come. He really pushed me last night, and I bit my thumb, moaned, opened my eyes every now and then (and then they’d roll back into my head). He really kept me on the edge for an extended period of time. And when I came I worked hard to not let my muscles push him out - I did quite well although controlling that results in a strange sort of orgasm. I come, but it’s in fits and spurts.

Earlier, I rode him, my legs weary from exercise but my spirit being willing enough to propel me up and down on his cock.

After I’ve come, I’m speechless. The only speech I manage to regain quickly is the ability to say, “Thank you, Sir.” Then I lay down and bask in the afterglow - and catch my breath. As I cuddled up close to him last night I thought, “Life is good. I’m happy.”

(We used a new riding crop I got to review last night, and the pain was part of the pleasure for me. A review will come along shortly.)

Ride, Nadia, Ride

Published
by
Nadia
on June 7, 2009
in D/s, Uncategorized, bdsm, blow jobs, horny and sex
. 0 Comments

On Saturday night we stayed in. I was more inclined to stay home and I appreciate that we did that although I think he’d have preferred to have some new couple over. I wasn’t feeling particularly social.

Every so often he likes to have someone listen to us on the telephone. He spent some time navigating a phone chat service, having me record messages every so often. He told me to start playing with my bullet vibe and I lay back on the bed, my feet towards his head, legs spread open and start rubbing the vibrating bullet on my clit. He reminded me that he’d like me to go slowly with getting myself aroused. I stroke the bullet along my labia, teasing the clitoris every so often. The vibrations on my lips are less intense than the ones on my clit. Overall I’m not that into having someone listen in, but once things got started I was really getting into the idea of submitting to him while someone could hear.

He must have decided to give up on the phone as he put it down and had me suck his cock. I threw myself into it, getting it in deep. I’m proud of myself that I have a much better handle on my gag reflex now than I used to. I love slurping his cock up into my mouth, swirling my tongue on his head. My saliva gets flowing and I lick the length of his cock in between taking as much of it into my mouth as possible.

He had me get on top to ride. My body was tired from exercising earlier, but if I focused on my arousal I could forget about the fatigue. I rode him long and slow, gradually increasing in speed. As he let me come he slapped my face and this made me come harder.

After a break he had me ride again until my body was worn out and I felt like I couldn’t go on any more. He had me stop, and I rested for a moment. But I could feel his cock getting hard inside me again, so I started sliding my hips back and forth. It seemed like he was going along with it, but then he chided me, “Trying to sneak in another one, huh?” I grinned because I’d been caught.

I lay down behind him as he lay on his side looking at the computer. I stroked his back gently, and I soon realized he was stroking his cock. I was still horny so I pressed my naked body up against his back and caressed his body all over. While I was doing this, he was busy making himself come. I could feel him shudder as he came.

I didn’t say anything, but I was still horny after that. I considered masturbating, but we started watching a movie and I moved on from my nagging horniness. The next day, however, I was still incredibly horny.

Beating and Review: The Curve

Published
by
Nadia
on June 6, 2009
in D/s, Uncategorized, bdsm, depression, flogging, masochism, orgasm denial, orgasm on command, reviews, sex toys, shio, spanking and squirting
. 0 Comments

It had been a while since he beat me. I got to feeling neglected on Thursday night while he chatted up women online, I should have brought my computer so I could busy myself online as well. I got a little grumpy, but he took me into the bedroom for some cuddles and to point out that rather than getting sulky, when he’s ignoring me I’m welcome to snuggle against him now and then and see if I can distract him from what he’s doing. The next day he ignored me some more, he had an issue to deal with and he let me know that he was grumpy and I should leave him alone. So as per his request, I left him alone. Unfortunately I was feeling really needy for attention. I started to get depressed and so went and snuggled up in bed by myself.

He found me there, and asked if I was tired or just feeling blah. I told him I was feeling blah and he crawled into bed next to me to cheer me up. Later on he would point out that rather than get depressed, I should express my needs so he knows that I need attention. He said he didn’t want to reinforce bad behavior (sulking, getting depressed) so next time I want attention I should ask for it.

Despite his not wanting to reinforce bad behavior, he took some time to cheer me up in the foolproof way - a beating and orgasms. As I said, he hadn’t beat me in a while - I’m not really sure how long. He sucked and nibble on my nipples for a while. He had me get out some toys and my collar, and he had me get on all fours on the bed. He flogged my ass with the little flogger, gradually increasing in intensity. He’d stop and come forward so he could spank my ass with his hands, and to use the flogger on my upper back. Then he’d resume flogging my butt and thighs. He got really rough - I wasn’t sure I could handle it at times.

After several minutes of this, he had me lay on my back. He resumed flogging me, this time on my sensitive inner thighs. He had me put my hands behind my head so he could flog my breasts as well. He has terrific aim, and he hit my nipples mercilessly. He slapped my inner thighs and it hurt so much. He took to slapping, then flogging, my pussy and a few times the leather of the flogger hit my clit directly. Ouch!

I was wincing, squeezing my eyes shut. He got out the blindfold and had me put it on, he said it was easier to beat me if he couldn’t see my eyes. The blindfold blocked out all light and sight. He beat me some more, and I was unable to anticipate the blows. He’d finger my pussy a little, get me breathless and worked up, then start slapping my thighs again.

After the beating, he grabbed my new Curve dildo. I was probably already quite wet, but he used some lube on the toy. “Are you ready to get your pussy stuffed?” “Yes, Sir,” I replied.

The dildo is fairly thick and while parts of the the silicone are smooth the rest is somewhat textured. I needed more lube to get it inserted comfortably. He played with it, thrusting it in and out. The curve met my g-spot, but sometimes if he thrusted too hard he’d bang against my cervix, which hurt. He adjusted his thrust and soon I was moaning as he fucked me with the dildo. After a short while, he reached for the Hitachi Magic Wand and placed it against my clit. Ohmyfuckinggod! Being filled with the dildo and having my clit vibrated with the wand I was close to orgasm in no time. I started to beg.

“Oh, please Sir!” I gasped, “Please let me come! Please, please, please!” I was so close to orgasm I couldn’t stop begging for release. He kept me begging for a little while. I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to hold back.

With the curve filling me up and the wand working on my clit, when he gave me permission to come I had one of the most amazing orgasms I have ever had. I screamed out. I writhed so that the blindfold eventually slid off my head. I grabbed at his back and the bedsheets. I kept saying, “Fuck, fuck, fuck!” over and over again. It was a very long, very intense orgasm, or series of orgasms. I squirted a big puddle on the bedsheets. The combination of The Curve and the Wand is phenomenal. I don’t know that the Curve will be my favorite dildo (I still like the glass dildoes better), but it’s definitely a hit.

The Fun Factory Curve is silicone and therefore sterilizable and phthalate-free. It’s available at sex toys shop Vibrator.com and is in their dildo section. It comes in violet or pink (I was sent my favorite color - violet!) and has a head that comes to a prounounced bump to hit your g-spot. The handle can be used to thrust it or rubbed up against your clit while your pussy is stuffed with the dildo. It’s flexible yet firm.

The Rest of the Weekend

Published
by
Nadia
on June 2, 2009
in D/s, Uncategorized, bdsm, dom, orgasm denial, orgasm on command, porn, sex, sex toys, shio, squirting and submissive
. 0 Comments

My mood improved over Saturday. By Saturday evening I was feeling reasonably sociable and our friend V. came over.  She had a new flogger that her friend made from salvaged material (rubber) and she wanted to try it out. She had tried it with her girlfriend, but there was an issue with controlling it. She wanted to have MasterDoc try it since he’s much more experienced with floggers. It quickly became clear that the strands were too long and that was the issue. After a moment’s hesitation, V. agreed that he could cut the flogger down a bit. Eight inches or so later, the flogger was much more manageable. MasterDoc used it on V.’s butt for a while, then I got a turn. Man it stung!

On Sunday he and I went out to lunch and otherwise spent the day around his place. After I finished my required Wii Fit, I went to see MasterDoc who was lying in the bedroom, watching porn. We hadn’t necessarily planned to have sex just then, but he was inspired by a bit of the porn - the submissive was tied up (suspended but on her feet) with a magic wand at her clit. She was given two minutes to come. He had me get the magic wand out, put my collar on and get undressed. He teased me with the wand until I was aching to come. Then suddenly he said, “You have two minutes to come all you want. Go.” Instantly I started to come, screaming and quivering. I kept right on coming for the full two minutes, and it was hard to stop myself when he told me to stop. It felt amazing. Next he asked me if I was ready to be fucked. Oh yes please! He had me get the Liberator Wedge to put under his ass and I got on top for a ride. I was all wet from coming just moments before. We hadn’t had sex in two weeks and it was heavenly to feel his cock inside me.

Yesterday I was acutely aware of what at turn on it is for him to have control over when I orgasm. As I rode his cock I got more and more turned on thinking about how much I wanted to come, but that I wasn’t allowed to as of yet. I kept moaning and breathing heavy, fucking him frantically, feeling his cock slide in and out of me as my clit rubbed up against his tummy. At one point he slapped my face a few times and called me a whore. Jesus, that turned me on even more. I kept hoping he’d do it again. He made me promise that if I was allowed to come that I wouldn’t let my vaginal muscles push his cock out. I knew how hard that would be but I whimpered, “I promise I’ll try my best, Sir,” as I was desperate to come. Initially it worked, I focused on controlling my vaginal muscles while also letting myself orgasm. I struggled with it and ultimately got the point where I said, “Oh I can’t help it anymore!” and my muscles clenched down and pushed his cock out. Since he had said I was only allowed to come as long as his cock was inside me he ordered me to stop right then. The command didn’t sink in and I came for another few seconds, which he was not happy with. He asked me about it after to make sure it wasn’t me willfully disobeying, and I didn’t do it intentionally.

Since MasterDoc’s been sick lately, I didn’t really think we’d have more sex later on, but we did. Lucky me! The BDSM porn from before was put on again, and I reached down into my panties and played with myself - thinking how hot it must be to see a woman who is so horny that she will just lose herself in playing with her pussy. I would steal glances at MasterDoc stroking his cock, and at the porn. I worked myself up into a frenzy and hoped that my masturbating in front of him turned him on. He had me get lube and a condom and he fucked me from behind. There was much moaning and whimpering from me as it seemed to last forever. Oh dear god, it feels amazing and frustrating at the same time. When I have vanilla sex with someone, there’s this build up to orgasm and then an orgasm. It’s pretty quick. But with submitting to MasterDoc I’m held in state of all-consuming arousal for an extended period of time. I had such a hard time holding back. He fucked me hard and made me desperate to come. When I came, I squirted and fell forward after his cock was pushed out of me. I kept coming, and he kept stroking my back, grabbing my hair and touching me to prolong the feeling. I later had the thought that it must feel amazing to be able to make me come like that - intense orgasms even while there’s no direct genital contact.

After rest, there was some more fucking. This time I was on my back. I was pleasantly surprised at MasterDoc’s stamina considering he’s been sick and having back pain lately. Usually, after we fuck I’m in this blissful state where I curl up against him and stroke his chest… my arousal not abating. I get hopeful that my touching him and kissing his chest will get him to fuck me again, and very often I’m successful. (Of course, it is more than likely true that he wants to fuck some more and it’s not just my desire that fuels it.) On Sunday night I didn’t want to be too aggressive though, as I knew he hadn’t been feeling well. But he fucked me for a while and let me come - slapping my pussy to keep me coming (and squirting).

Now, three wonderful fucks in one day would have been enough to make me VERY happy. But he decided to fuck me again, this time with me on top. He reached around and slapped my ass which just drove me wild. I’m very lucky to have a Dom who wants to have sex over and over in an evening. By the time the evening was over, I was grinning like an idiot and amazingly happy. Good sex cures my depression pretty much every time - I haven’t felt depressed since.

I noticed that evening the feeling of intimacy that comes from being submissive to someone (over a long period of time). It’s not quite there in vanilla sex. My pleasure is directly tied to his pleasure and choices as to what we do, and as such that’s extremely intimate.

He asked me, “So was that worth waiting two weeks for?” Hell yes!

The Start of the Weekend

Published
by
Nadia
on May 30, 2009
in D/s, bdsm, depression, dom and emotions
. 0 Comments

(I’m back dating this entry to Saturday, when I actually wrote it. Shortly I’ll follow this up with an entry on how much better the weekend got.)

I was hoping to have more sexy stories to share with you, but unfortunately last night my back bothered me a great deal and I was depressed. I discovered yet another reason why it’s wonderful to have a doctor for a Dom, he can use his knowledge of anatomy to give you one fantastic back massage. He really presses and digs in where it needs to be loosened up and I feel much better immediately afterward.

I think I’ve been nursing a bit of a depression for at least several days now, but it didn’t dawn on me until last night. I felt incapacitated by the depression (and the backache didn’t help). I started to feel guilty that I wasn’t taking care of MasterDoc like I should (his back was bothering him and he’s still coughing and sick). So then I was adding depression about my lack of ability to fulfill my submissive duties to the depression I already had. MasterDoc is really perceptive though, and he knew to ask if my problem was just the physical part of my back hurting or if there was a psychological aspect as well. I cried a bit, not really entirely sure why I’m depressed. (This is why the illness of depression is so fun - you feel sad and miserable and have no idea why!) Work has been stressful for a long time now, that’s about all I can think of. My eating has gotten to be terrible (lots of junk) and I’m feeling more and more demotivated to exercise.

Now granted, if my back hadn’t hurt (it was iffy all day but then vacuuming MasterDoc’s living room pushed it over the edge) I probably would have had sex with him and the orgasms would have made me feel much better both physically and psychologically. But we didn’t get that far. MasterDoc was wonderful, making me laugh as best he could and making sure I knew that I’m loved. When I said that I felt bad about feeling bad, he said, “Oh no! We’ll have none of that! You can feel bad all you want but no feeling bad about feeling bad!” Teehee. I hate that I needed taking care of last night, but thankful that MasterDoc understands that I can’t control my depression. He took care of me and I’m really grateful for that.

Today I’m still feeling blue for no good reason. My back is a little better although rather stiff. I did some yoga this morning (after MasterDoc suggested it the night before) which helped get me moving. Hopefully tonight I’ll get out of this funk long enough to have sex - it’s been nearly two weeks now!

Sybian Ride

Published
by
Nadia
on May 26, 2009
in D/s, Uncategorized, masturbation, orgasm on command and sybian
. 0 Comments

Things have been quiet here at Kinky Librarian. I haven’t had sex in a week. I know! How could I go for so long? Will I have to downgrade my sex goddess status? With MasterDoc being sick and other things keeping me busy there hasn’t been a chance to get it on. We might have gotten it on yesterday, but unfortunately I’m a bit injured from a sybian ride the night before.

Since he still isn’t feeling well, MasterDoc decided to give me a sybian ride on Sunday night. Turning the nob to regulate the vibrations is certainly easier than anything else he could have done to get me off. He had me put on my collar. I set up the machine, lubed myself up, put a condom on the medium sized dildo and got on. He kept the vibrations really low for a while. Instead of turning me on it felt vaguely irritating. I had a hard time getting it into quite the right position.

Eventually he upped the vibration speed, and I got turned on. I started rocking my hips back and forth gently and grinding my clit against the nubbly pad of the dildo. He was sitting on the edge of the couch right in front of me, and he had me put my hands on his knees. As he turned up the vibration I started leaning forward so that my forearms were on his knees/thighs. My jaw dropped open and I held back from coming as best I could. Sometimes lately I manage to hold off and not beg even until he decides to give me permission to come. When he let me come, my body spasmed and I fell forward. My head leaned hard against his chest and my arms embraced his torso. I grunted, said many “Oh God”s and my thighs clenched the sides of the machine. I kept coming and kept grinding myself against the sybian. It felt like I might push the dildo out of my vagina at one point, the contractions were so strong. Just as I was feeling too wiped out to go on (I woke up with a bit of a cold that morning, I wasn’t feeling in tip-top shape) he said, “That’s enough” and turned off the vibration. I’m surprised I could stand and walk right after the ride.

Unfortunately, the next day I was really sore.  Actually, I’m still really sore. I’m not entirely sure why as I’ve certainly ground my cunt into the sybian before. There’s a terribly sore spot right at the opening to my vagina. Needless to say it’s out of commission for a few days until things heal up. It feels like it did when the couple I used to play with stuck a large dildo in me without warm up or lube a couple of years ago. Maybe I didn’t use enough lube.  Maybe running the machine on a low setting was more irritating than anything else. I don’t know, but it sure is annoying to be sore and sexless. I’ve thought about maybe using the smaller dildo with the sybian instead - I think the medium might be a bit much for my cunt when it’s not warmed up at all.

Passionate Fucking on a Sunday Afternoon

Published
by
Nadia
on May 18, 2009
in D/s, Uncategorized, blow jobs, cunt, orgasm denial, sex, shio and squirting
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I had expected to not see MasterDoc for a stretch of 10 days, thankfully he found free time a couple of times this week. Sunday afternoon I got to spend time time at his place. He was tired when he first got home so he held me off for a while, but then he decided he was up for it. While he has guests staying at his place this week (his friend Liz’s parents) they were out for a while, so we had the place to ourselves. But rather than having sex in the living room on the floor, or in the spare room, we were confined to the master bedroom with the squeaky bed. On the up side, the squeaky bed is king-sized.

We got naked and he had me set up some porn on the laptop (which we never ended up turning on). I had been really horny for days so I started stroking his cock without being told. We cuddled up close and I kept his hard cock in my hand. I caressed his inner thighs and near the base of his cock. He complimented me on my skills - which is very satisfying to hear. I sucked his cock for a little bit, and then went back to stroking it. He rolled over onto his side and as I continued to stroke his hard cock he reached over and started playing with my pussy. He had me wet his fingers with saliva and he caressed my cunt, getting me aroused. He had me wet his fingers again and he slid them into me. He fingered me, prodding my g-spot. It felt so delightful that I was breathing heavy and pressing back against his fingers. He had me beg before he would allow me to come. When I came, his fingers kept right on stroking the inside of me and I felt like I squirted but I’m not sure that I actually did. His strong fingers pressed inside me and my orgasm went on for a while.

After, I was in a daze but quickly thanked him for my orgasm. I felt amazing, but I was glad when it turned out we weren’t done. I sucked his cock for a while, making sure it was hard. He had me put a condom on him and we decided to use the Liberator Wedge underneath him while I got on top. This put his hips up higher than usual and kept his cock deep inside me. I rode his cock, and it was like every nerve ending in my vagina was on full alert. I closed my eyes and concentrated on fucking him. The wedge helped him thrust especially deep. I gasped and started hoping he’d let me come. I kept fucking him, rocking my body back and forth, listening to the incessant squeaking of the bed. When he let me come I grunted and moaned like an animal in heat. His cock stayed in me longer with the wedge underneath him. After the orgasm, I took a break and rested on him. We talked and cuddled a bit, but then he started moving his hips again. I thought I was too tired to go on but I became aroused again. We fucked a bit longer until my vaginal muscles pushed his cock out and I said, “Shit!”

We rested and cuddled some more. I love being pressed up close against him, my hand stroking his chest. I was already feeling quite satisfied when he said, “Is your cunt wet?” I reached down and found that I was still dripping wet from before. He had me get on my hands and knees and bend over the wedge. He fucked me from behind and it felt so wonderful that I almost didn’t want to come, because I knew if I came that would end the fucking. He fucked me hard and I kept moaning and crying out in pleasure. I made such a racket, it’s a damn good thing no one else was in his apartment. I wondered if I would manage to hold back coming until he gave permission. I waited a while before asking for permission but the pleasure became too intense I had to start begging. But he didn’t let me come. He told me that I wasn’t going to be allowed just then. I went back to savoring the feeling of his cock sliding in and out of me. I made noises as if I was coming but it was just from the rolling waves of pleasure coursing through me.

When he did let me come it was intense. I lost track of my surroundings and all I was aware of was my vaginal muscles clenching, and squirting a whole lot of liquid, and his hand slapping my cunt as I kept coming and coming, my juices splattering. The bed and wedge were soaked. Thankfully he didn’t mind.

I thanked him, and was a very, very happy and satisfied slut.

Masturbation

Published
by
Nadia
on May 16, 2009
in D/s, bisexuality, masturbation and porn
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When I was young I masturbated all the time. Doing it a few times in one day wasn’t unusual. I ferreted away things like Frederick’s of Hollywood catalogs, and the stray Penthouse my father lost track of, to masturbate to. Since becoming an adult however, I find that things like time and energy (the lack thereof) keep me from masturbating nearly as much. Granted, I get sex now too and I didn’t get sex when I was young and masturbating a few times a day.
Quite a while ago MasterDoc put restrictions on my masturbation - I think at first it was once a week, then increased to twice a week. I had to tease myself and keep myself on the edge of coming as practice. Months later he amended that to I had to make myself come as quickly as possible for one of them, and could do it how I wanted for the other. Nowadays it’s merely confined to twice a week - whatever way I want.

Most weeks I don’t get two times in, let alone need to ask for permission for more. So this week is unusual in that I have masturbated four times. One time with MasterDoc when I saw him on Wednesday (I figure that if I’m masturbating with him involved it doesn’t count for one of my two times a week), the next Thursday night, again Friday morning, then I wanted to do it again Friday night, but I knew I needed to get permission from him for that. It was getting late and I didn’t want to bother him so I didn’t - masturbate or ask for permission. (Although my crafty brain kept saying, “Hey, you know he’ll say yes so why not just do it?” Luckily I was a good little submissive and I didn’t do so without getting his permission first.) Then today I was still horny so I texted him asking for permission, which he granted.

When I did it with him by my side on Wednesday, it was certainly enhanced by him being there and touching me. I find that sometimes when I do it alone it’s harder to come - I think because I’m not at such a high level of arousal as I am around him. With him there’s the anticipation of when he’ll let me come - or will he let me come even? When he talks to me, teasing me verbally, I get really worked up. Having him stroke my face and gently touch my labia as I press the bullet vibe to my clit sends me over the edge.

On Thursday I masturbated the old fashioned way - a way I’ve been masturbating since I was a little girl - I grabbed hold of the fabric of my panties and undulated my hips so that my mons and clit rubbed against the fabric until I came. This is the way I’ve managed to masturbate while driving the various times I’ve done that (not lately sadly).

Friday morning consisted of me getting the bullet vibe out as time ticked towards my having to leave for work. I came, but not hard, and I ended up walking into work a couple of minutes late.

Friday night I was really horny and really wishing I had MasterDoc’s cock inside me. Rowr. But mostly I watched Black Adder episodes and surfed the net.

Today, I put on some porn - a double penetration scene in a doctor’s office (the two male doctors take on the female patient). It was hot in some ways, but I was bothered by the fact that the woman never seemed to come and there didn’t seem to be concern about her coming or not - it was all about the guys’ pleasure. (I didn’t watch it entirely through.) But I focused on the action and used my bullet vibe to come. Again, not a great orgasm but it did the job.

My libido is so high these days that I still feel horny. It’s a relief after my lack of libido (thanks to prozac) many months back. But sometimes I feel tense and on edge because I’m so horny. Tonight I have a date coming over (second date with a woman I had a first date with a couple of weeks back) and I hope I don’t feel like a randy teenage boy. I have no idea if sex will be a part of the night and I certainly don’t assume, especially since I’ve never so much as kissed this woman.

Maybe I’ll need to ask for permission to masturbate again before this evening.