Archive for the 'edge play' Category

Fear

Published
by
Nadia
on July 7, 2009
in D/s, bdsm, edge play, emotions, kink, masochism, piss play, submissive and trust
. 0 Comments

I have an interesting relationship with fear. A love-hate relationship I suppose. I don’t like watching horror movies - I hate the way they make me feel afraid. I don’t like being made to jump suddenly. (I flinch easily - if I round a corner and encounter a person I hadn’t expected to see there, I will flinch.) I don’t even watch a lot of suspense films. But on the other hand I sometimes watch those “true haunting” shows on tv, always in the hopes I’ll actually, eventually get to see some real proof of a ghost. From a young age, I was fascinated with the idea of ghosts and interested in the dark side of life that many are afraid of. My best friend and I were glued to the Ouija board for a good year or so as teenagers. We thought we were communing with demons and other spirits, of course my older, cynical self thinks much of it - if not all of it - was in our heads. But it was fun times, being friendly with dark spirits we shouldn’t have been playing with. It all held a tingle of fear, but what a thrill to be facing it head on.

While doing bdsm play with someone you trust is important, after all safety is key, I can understand the thrill of doing it with someone you don’t know so well. Why? Fear. One of the things I love about MasterDoc is that he has proven himself trustworthy, and yet he can still instill fear in me. It’s the perfect combination. Safe, but not too safe.

It wasn’t until several months into our relationship that I realized I liked it when he’d make me scared. While I’m disgusted by the notion of things like being peed on or made to do analingus, the idea that he can threaten me with it, and that I can get afraid because I know full well that he would - and indeed will - make me do these things sometime is a total turn on. Yes, I get off on some fear. To be clear, it’s not the act, it’s the fact that he can make me do the act despite my own disgust and reluctance that’s the turn on. The feeling that I lack control, that I’ve given control up to him is a turn on. (Interesting that non-consensual lack of control is so very different than consensual. I’ve been traumatized by non-consensual acts in my life.)

I mentioned to him recently that we seemed to be doing less bdsm, or at least less intense bdsm lately. As we relaxed on his bed last night and I hoped that we’d get freaky, we talked for a bit. He got that evil glint in his eye that always makes me nervous. He started talking about how, by complaining that the bdsm hasn’t been intense enough, I was virtually asking for him to pee in my mouth. I acknowledged that I knew that was a risk I was taking. He went down that path, making me sing a little song to the tune of an old Campbell’s soup commercial, “Mm-mm good, mm-mm good, MasterDoc’s pee is, mm-mm good.” I tell you, it was desperately hard to get those words to come out of my mouth. I was scared he’d do it. I was scared by the idea of it.

And it’s funny, afterwards, we came to the realization that his threats, his taking my thoughts down the path to difficult submissive activities, was actually rough (in other words HOT) bdsm. Just by talking we engaged in a bit of a scene.

Some wonderful orgasms came later (kneeling! I could barely hold myself up.), and there was much cock sucking, and still more orgasms courtesy of the magic wand. While the orgasms were fulfilling in a way I needed sexually, the talk we had had was fulfilling in the way that my kinky brain needs to be pushed into fear sometimes. Fear can be delicious. It can get me wet. And some days I crave it.

No Worries

Published
by
Nadia
on March 13, 2009
in D/s, analingus, bdsm, edge play, piss play and trust
. 1 Comment

I received a concerned email after my last post, which I understand (and appreciate!) but I want to make sure that everyone realizes I’m okay. Yes, MasterDoc pushes my limits, and yes, I can adamantly say no. The person who wrote was concerned that doing anything for your Dom is a slippery slope, and while with some men it can be, MasterDoc is not going to make me do anything as wrong as hiding bodies or anything like that. (Besides, I have enough of a brain in my head to know that something like murder would land me in jail and NOBODY is worth that shit and no one who loves me would make me do that.) He gradually introduces new things - mostly by introducing the idea at first. He conditions me to get used to these things he wants to do (and again, let me point out that it’s not anything that will bring me or anyone else harm) and eventually introduces them. When I met him I couldn’t picture anyone pissing on me, or me performing analingus, but I’ve experienced both those things now. And you know what? While I still don’t like ass licking, I’ve come to no harm mentally or physically. I don’t crave him peeing on me but the worst part of the situation was that the tub I lay in was cold. Seriously. He’s also never introduced something that he hadn’t mentioned being interested in at the outset. I get fair warning as to what he eventually expects from me… and murder, harm or any sort of crazy thing like that is NOT on the menu. I have time to dig my heels in and say no. And if he were ever to suggest something harmful I would say no and walk away.

Also, for those of you who don’t know MasterDoc you probably don’t realize that a large portion of the time he threatens disgusting things it’s a headfuck. And the headfuck is part of the D/s playing between us. (Sometimes I get really turned on when he scares me, or when he humiliates me. I’m a sick freak, I know. ;-) Last night he admitted that his plan (preempted by our playmate canceling for today) was never actually to piss in my mouth. He figured if he threatened it then I’d be over the moon at him simply pissing on me. He’d tell me that I’d better make it convincing that I’m enjoying his pee on me or he’d piss in my mouth then. But he acknowledges that I’m not ready for the mouth pissing thing. I’ve told him it will be quite some time before I am. But he would not be the Dom if he didn’t keep trying to condition me to submit that far. Is this unusual compared to vanilla relationships? Hell yes. But I have developed enough trust and confidence to know he won’t do anything that will truly harm me. Sometimes the headfuck gets me worried, but inevitably he soothes me and lets me know it’s just a headfuck. (For now!) Our relationship is unusual, but it works for us.

While I’m glad and relieved that there will be no pee in my mouth today, unfortunately MasterDoc needed to take some ritalin to get things done (he has ADD) and sex isn’t in the cards for today. I’ve been trying out my new SaSi and a review will come after I feel I’ve given it a fair trial.

Begging to Come

Published
by
Nadia
on January 10, 2009
in D/s, Uncategorized, bdsm, blow jobs, edge play, kink, orgasm denial, sex and sex parties
. 0 Comments

Our original plans were to go to a swing/bdsm party tonight, but our area is getting lots of snow (or perhaps not quite as much as they originally said, but at any rate, it’s snowing and a little slippery out). So we changed our plans and went out last night. When we got to the club it was busy, but no one was actually doing anything. I was keen to play but not actually feeling very horny, MasterDoc was feeling kinda lackluster as well. We spent some time hanging out. I knew that if MasterDoc felt like it, he could easily turn me on within a matter of minutes.

Eventually we ended up in the back bdsm room, and he had me suck his cock for a while. This started to get my pussy tingling. I was keen to go on but he had me take a break, and we cuddled on the bed. I can’t quite recall how exactly we got started, but MasterDoc did something that surprised me, particularly in a mostly vanilla setting like a swing club - he slapped me. But he didn’t just slap me once, he slapped me first on one cheek a few times, then on the other, then back again - a little harder than he usually does. I let my eyes drift closed and swooned a bit. I think the shockingness of it and the controlled violence was a huge turn on for me. He had me take my top off and sit against the wall. There were a few onlookers by this time.

He had me get the nipple clamps out of the bag. As I packed the bag I wondered to myself why on earth I was packing them. He was nice to me and used the screws to loosen them a bit, but still when he put the first one on it pinched something awful. He pulled on the chain, twisting the clamp a bit and I winced at the pain. He put the other clamp on the other nipple and again it hurt so much. He played with the chain, twisting my nipples, tugging on the tightly clasped clamps. It definitely tested my limits of pain tolerance. He probably didn’t have them on very long but it felt like an eternity. When he took the first one off, my eyes were closed and I hadn’t expected it. I drew in a sharp breath of air and moaned. For the next one, he had me take a deep breath first and he took the other off. Immediately after removal usually hurts even worse than having the clamps on. While the clamps were on there were moments when I could take it and it didn’t hurt so much, but then it would start hurting again. I definitely feel like there’s a love hate relationship between me and those clamps.

He had me take my pants off so that I was naked. He had me suck his cock some more, and I did my best to take it in deep - all while trying to hold back my gag reflex. My mouth was wet and the blow job got to be sloppy with my saliva. My ass was in the air facing the onlookers in the room.

He had me turn around onto my hands and knees and he spanked my ass a bit. But saying “a bit” doesn’t really cover it - he spanked me hard. He slapped my ass so hard it was sore and tender right away. Then he got out the little paddle (actually a callus smoother for your feet) and hit me some more. It stung. He asked me if I was ready to get fucked and I said, “Yes, Sir I’m ready to be fucked.”

He had me play with my bullet vibe for a little while and I was so on the edge of orgasm. I wanted his cock so badly and wanted to come so badly. He lay me down and fucked me missionary style. I gasped and moaned, teetering on the edge of orgasm. I held off asking for permission to come, and after some hard fucking he decided that he wanted to spank me some more.

He had me get on the spanking bench. He used the big flogger and it thudded against my ass and hips. He instructed me to sit up a little, and he started flogging my upper back. Soon, he switched to the little, stingy flogger and was flogging my butt and back, alternatively. The little flogger really hurts on my upper back - it’s hard to take. But I took every hit. He had me bend back down again and spanked my ass some more. He was exceptionally rough with me last night. There seemed to be one or two men there who enjoyed watching me get used and beaten.

When he was done, he had me suck his cock some more. “That’s it, suck it bitch! Suck my cock. Suck it and get it hard and maybe I’ll fuck you. Would you like that?”

I stopped sucking for just a moment and said, “Yes, Sir.”

“Yes, Sir what?”

“Yes, Sir, I’d like to get fucked, Sir”

I got his cock up and hard. This time he had me kneel on the bed with my head down. He slid into me from behind and I let out a moan. He slapped my ass and pounded into me off and on. I’d moan and groan when he fucked hard and deep. I so wanted to come. I asked for permission and he told me not yet. But he kept up with pounding me and it was so hard to hold back from coming. I’m sure he knew exactly what he was doing to me. I asked again for permission and he told me, “Beg, bitch.” So although it’s a bit humiliating in front of a crowd I begged him to let me come. Finally he told me to come and unfortunately immediately my muscles pushed his cock right out. Without missing a beat he slid his fingers into me and I continued to come, screaming. I would have loved to continue for a long time but eventually he told me that I had had enough and he took his fingers out of me. I lay down on the bed and asked him for a cuddle.

I find lately that when I’m coming out of subspace I’m pretty needy. I feel emotional and need cuddles and hugs. It was comforting to lay close to him and feel the hairs of his chest against my face. When I had come down sufficiently, we both got up and dressed and had drinks.

This was enough for one evening, and we left soon after.

2008 in Review

Published
by
Nadia
on January 1, 2009
in D/s, Uncategorized, assault, bdsm, best sex bloggers, caning, depression, edge play, exhibitionism, fisting, masochism, orgasm on command, pillow princess, piss play, sexuality and year in review
. 0 Comments

I didn’t have plans to do this, but I’ve seen some of my favorite bloggers post year end summaries for the past year and I decided to spend some time today reading through my entries to take a look at the year that was 2008. (I spent hours today re-reading my entries from this year. Damn, I write a lot!)

I started off the year having a great sex, albeit with the hindrance of prozac killing my libido and response. I didn’t consider myself a masochist at the start of the year, but in early February I changed that identification of myself. On the other hand, I started off the year bruising quite nicely, but now I barely bruise on my ass. I was also struggling with coming on command - not quite able to hold myself at a peak of arousal and not always able to come when permission was granted. Davey watched me get Dommed by MasterDoc and MasterDoc made me eat out of a bowl on the floor like a dog. MasterDoc and I continued doing shows for strangers.

In February I fucked a black guy for the first time in my life, and the entry was titled (at MasterDoc’s insistence) “BBC and Me.” My dose of prozac was lowered, which helped my libido and ability to come, but not by much (didn’t help my depression). MasterDoc decided we were going to lose weight together and we embarked on exercising and eating better. S. and I gave Davey a surprise threesome for his birthday.

In March I spent a lot of time reflecting on submission, what it means to me and why I do it. It’s been good to re-read those entries. I also waxed poetic about being face slapped. I suffered a bout of depression and clearly the lowered dose of prozac wasn’t adequate. It was also nearing the anniversary of the time I was sexually assaulted at a play party, and I still dwelled quite a bit on that.

In April I started off the month reflecting on why I enjoy public sex.  Davey, MasterDoc and I attempted double penetration but were unsuccessful (this is still true). I participated in sugasm for the first time. I wrote a bit about feminism and submission. We used a female condom for sex one time. I masturbated without permission and felt horribly guilty about it and confessed right away. At some point along the way I fell in love with MasterDoc. I had a challenging evening when we had a woman guest and I felt superfluous to the whole situation.

In May I proclaimed my average-ness. I started lusting after Photoshop and Dreamweaver to make my own site (I was still on blogspot at the time). And MasterDoc’s Puppy came for a visit. I had the first hint that maybe I could come without genital stimulation at some point. I purchased this domain and started trying to figure out how to get a blog up and running. I ended up going with wordpress, which I got installed for me.

My ass actually blistered a little bit after a spanking in June during one of our shows. I got called a pillow princess and reflected on my selfishness in bed, resolving to be less selfish. I discussed being assaulted three years ago at a play party and worked some more on dealing with the residual trauma from that. The swing club we frequent added a spanking bench, much to my and MasterDoc’s joy. I got swatted with a cane for the first time. I got good enough at riding the edge of orgasm that I could come when given the command (with genital stimulation).

I officially moved to kinkylibrarian.net at the start of July. (Looks like a few entries didn’t carry over when I made the switch. The old blog is still up, however.) I started talking about an interest in edge play like needle play and cutting. D.S. came for a visit and we had a very hot simultaneous orgasm. I contemplated many things like leading a double life, masochism and submission. I finally came without genital stimulation - and squirted too! I was on wellbutrin (in addition to prozac) for a little while by this time, and my sex drive had fully returned. I talked a little about early D/s experiences. I despaired over being denied orgasm, but was thrilled to have MasterDoc come in my mouth for the first time. MasterDoc and I had been seeing each other for a year by the end of this month.

In August I started participating in Half Nekkid Thursday, which I’ve done sporadically since. I struggled a bit with being a submissive and really opening myself up to someone - including giving MasterDoc my passwords to a few sites. We went to a hot (HOT) pool party. I started blogging over at Best Sex Bloggers. I spoke out about STIs and education. I had a very hot round of anal sex with MasterDoc, where I asked for more lube but then came really hard when he fucked me without adding lube. I enjoyed a moment of schadenfreude when I got to watch the online downfall of the guy who assaulted me (Jefferson). I don’t think I’ve blogged about the assault since - the experience of seeing him called on his bullshit by so many people really helped me heal a great deal.

September started out with me adding Babeland as an affiliate. (Still hasn’t netted me any money, but I still feel good about promoting that business.) I made the list of Top 100 Sex Bloggers. I also started reviewing toys, first for Lelo then for Babeland. Davey and I had a foursome while on vacation. MasterDoc and I gave an impromptu show one afternoon, then saw a couple in the evening. It dawned on me that our little shows technically make me a sex worker. I saw D.S. for one last time before he moved to San Francisco. I added Vibe Review as an affiliate at the end of the month.

In October, I put a toy into MasterDoc’s ass for the first time. I also wrote the terrific line, “I was a horny mass of sluttiness at that point.” I continued to try to get my head around the idea of him pissing on me. I wrote a little about dealing with depression while being submissive and how a beating can really make me feel better. MasterDoc made me come by slapping my clit. I talked about my early sexual and bdsm experiences. I had a bout of depression and cried during a scene - really cried - for the first time.

By November I could come at MasterDoc’s command quite well. I got philosophical about how change is an integral part of life. I came and squirted from being spanked at a swing club and later that night got fucked up the ass in public for the second time. One evening I became so turned on that I couldn’t turn off - and that ended up being the night that MasterDoc peed on me for the first time. I was so turned on and so deep into submission that I came as he peed on my clit. I went to the NYC Sex Blogger Calendar party and met a bunch of fellow bloggers. I also participated in Pleasurists for the first time. I come some more from pain and come again without being touched at all.

I started off December feeling cross with MasterDoc, but things were soon resolved and I wrote a post about how wonderful he is. He had a Domme-in-training come by for lessons and she fucked me with a strap on. The next night, a Dom came over with his three submissives and we had a fun bdsm orgy of sorts. I fisted a woman for the first time. MasterDoc figured out that he could use my new anal beads as a whip. Yikes. I fell ill with a stomach virus and actually turned down sex one day. But we used that time to go over my bdsm checklist and see what limits could be pushed in the future that perhaps we’ve been neglecting. We finished off the year going to a gangbang party last weekend.

All-in-all it’s been a hot year and I’ve come a long way with coming on command. I enjoyed reviewing my year via my blog but jeez, I really was at it for several hours. Thank you all for reading and I hope to have more adventures in 2009.

Newsflash: Nadia Turns Down Sex!

Published
by
Nadia
on December 18, 2008
in D/s, Uncategorized, analingus, bdsm, edge play, illness, piss play, sex and trust
. 0 Comments

It’s been a craptacular week all around. If you follow my twitter you know I’ve been sick with a stomach virus the past few days. I feel pretty awful. I also heard about some bad news at work. The economy is definitely affecting libraries, meanwhile usage stats are going up! Please, support your local library. They provide knowledge, entertainment and internet access for FREE and are a vital service to a healthy community, especially in these hard times.

So on to the news. Yes, yesterday I was with MasterDoc and I turned down the idea of sex. I know, I know it’s amazing but it does happen from time to time and being sick is definitely up there on the list of reasons to turn down sex. I’m just too tired and battling occasional nausea. I was going to help MasterDoc jerk off but I found that it was even hard to watch porn because the gagging on cock scenes made me more queasy. In the end, he went and took care of things himself while I zoned out on the sofa in front of the tv. It was really weird to have him doing things for me. It’s wonderful that he will take care of me when I’m sick but of course it makes the dynamic go a bit pear-shaped temporarily. I found myself getting up and getting drinks and putting away clean dishes because I’m so used to it. I did give myself a break, however, as I really don’t feel well. I was the only one on my case to do stuff as usual, MasterDoc accepts that I’m not well and that I need a little taking care of for the time being.

We did find one fun thing to do together yesterday, and that was reviewing my bdsm checklist. (Quite like the one found here.) If you do bdsm, you have probably come across checklists before. They’re pretty useful when you’re playing with someone new to find out what their limits and interests are. He had me fill it out when I first met him, and then again review it a few months later to see if anything had changed. We went through the list this time together and he made notes for future reference. *grin*

Hey, if you can’t have sex, the next best thing is to talk about it!

While the focus sometimes feels like it’s on what limits of mine have weakened and can be pushed, he also pays attention to areas that have perhaps been neglected - things that I wish we would do more or things that we both have an interest in doing but haven’t done. It’s interesting how in the course of a D/s relationship your limits - or what you perceive to be your limits - can change. Things that I first put down as a hard limit (rimming, being peed on) are things I’ve now done. I’m sure some people will be up in arms at the idea of a Dom “going there” with a subs’ “hard limits” but it’s interesting how you can adjust to things when they’re talked about a lot beforehand. MasterDoc has proven very good at discerning what are my truly hard limits (choking, because being asthmatic I’ve dealt with the very scary feeling of not being able to breathe and I don’t like it) and what are things that I find distasteful but will survive doing without mental scars (rimming, pee). Over the course of my explorations in bdsm I’ve found things that initially put me off now seem fascinating - like needle play. There’s some things I’m excited that we’re planning to do (butt plug under clothes out in public, like when we go to a swing club) and things that make me nervous (peeing in front of an audience) but somehow play into the fact that I do like some humiliation and fear play. (And MasterDoc is oh so good at fear play - mainly because the things he threatens he might really do! I have reason to be afraid! You really never know what he’s saying just to scare you and what he’s saying because he plans to do it down the line. Yes, I can see that this situation would not be for everyone.) Reviewing the list was fun but also made me a wee bit nervous.

Dinner and a Few Fucks

Published
by
Nadia
on August 27, 2008
in D/s, Uncategorized, bdsm, dom, dp, edge play, horny, orgasm denial, porn and sex
. 2 Comments

I got to spend time with MasterDoc last night. I asked if he wanted me to go get dinner from the kitchen and he said, “Oh we’re going to eat now? I thought we were going to fuck.” Um well, like I’m going to say no to that! He told me to assume the position for best access and I found a position on the floor, on my knees, head down, ass up, legs apart. I lingered in that position for a while while he watched some porn.  He’d smack my ass every so often. I was getting turned on just being exposed to him like that, being left waiting for the fucking I was coming to want more and more. He finally came over and slid his cock into me. He fucked me for a bit, getting me really aroused. He stopped and put more lube down there and soon I felt a finger against my asshole. I moaned and pushed back on his cock and the finger. He slid his thumb in my ass and fucked me with the thumb inside me. I was a horny slut just loving the feeling of being penetrated in two holes. I begged to be allowed to come but he kept me on the edge. He’d fuck me hard and I’d beg even harder. Finally, he allowed me to come - under the caveat that I should under no circumstances push his cock out. I still haven’t quite gotten the hang of coming while not contracting - I rode this orgasmic wave for a while, semi-coming. I’m not sure if he pulled out or if I eventually pushed him out despite my efforts, but then he was fingering me, hard. I came and came and came. He really fingered me for a while. I’m a lucky girl! I was amazed by how long I could keep coming and coming.

After the fucking he sent me to get dinner from the kitchen. The food was a little so-so after sitting for a while and he couldn’t resist saying to me, “Well YOU wanted to fuck before dinner!”

After dinner we’re sitting on the sofa and he gets an idea (I can see this on his face). He holds out his thumb and says, “Suck my thumb.” I think ok, cool, submissive act, etc. but as I’m moving my head towards his thumb it dawns on me - that thumb had been up my ass. Eww. But I felt that by this time I had agreed to suck it and I couldn’t stop at that point (I was quite in submissive mode). He asked if I could taste my ass on it and I said no (thankfully!). He had been watching my face wondering at what point I realized that it was the thumb used on my ass. I explained that it hit me before I got it in my mouth.

We fucked some more, with me on my back. Again I begged to be allowed to come, but this time he didn’t give permission. He talked about fucking me up the ass and he realized that the bed would be better for that so we moved to the bedroom.

He had me set up some porn on the laptop and he fucked me some more, but not up my ass just yet. I begged to come but wasn’t allowed. We rested for a bit and he told me to find more porn online. I asked what category and he initially said anything I want, but then said, “No. Search for piss.” MasterDoc has been threatening to piss on me (and in my mouth) for as long as I’ve known him. It’s constantly hanging over my head. Piss play is not my kink, I have no problem with people indulging in it if that’s what they like but watching the piss porn just made me nauseous. (These women were soaked in the piss of several men and they spit it from mouth to mouth.) After we fucked (he never did fuck me up the ass. Pity, as I thought I might be able to come that way and not have to worry about my vaginal muscles pushing out), I curled up and tried not to watch the porn. I had complained that I was still horny (having been fucked a couple of times and not allowed to come, despite the orgasms I had earlier in the evening) and MasterDoc came up with an idea - I could play with my bullet vibe and make myself come, but I had to watch the piss porn while doing it. Yes, I can tell he is trying to condition me to like piss play. It was so hard to watch the piss porn as it’s totally not erotic to me, but I was so horny that I managed to sorta block out what I was watching and I had a great trembling orgasm. Thankfully, I was allowed to not watch after I came.

While we were hanging out after, MasterDoc said something about wanting to train me to orgasm less. Argh! If that’s not cruel and unusual punishment I don’t know what is. Orgasms are good. I just see myself walking around in a state of total frustration (and bitchiness) if I had fewer orgasms - particularly if he fucks me just as much and gets me so worked up.

I’ve got a writing assignment to do this week (I’m not seeing him again for a week, sigh) - I have to write an erotic account of what I’d like to happen next time I see the woman I went down on at the party last Friday. She was going to come play with us last night but mother nature intervened (period). I’ve been given permission to call her up and after setting up plans for Wednesday with MasterDoc and I, I can see if she’s available over the long weekend for me to see alone. Rowr. After I went down on her the other night she told me I’m really good at it, and as we said goodbye she gushed how she was so happy to have met me. Hee hee. I so infrequently get the attention of ladies I’m thrilled when it actually happens.
Today I was chatting with MasterDoc online and the idea of him having a live-in submissive came up, and he said he’s sure I’d freak out if he did that. And yes, I had to admit I would - and I realized that strangely, I’d be upset to have someone else doing the chores I do around his place. But after that I realized, duh, I’m a submissive, I should enjoy serving. I’d feel somehow less useful to him if I didn’t help around the house. Ultimately the big thing I’d be upset over is the idea of someone else getting time with him when I want to be spending time with him. I want more time with him, not less.

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I’ve put a new template into wordpress - pretty template but it does some weird things to my side bar (now the digsby widget and my list of categories are underneath everything, rather than to the right). Maybe I should just let the Curmudgeony Librarian work on my site when he gets time. I got mentioned on fleshbot and my site stats have soared over the past day. Cool beans! I love a larger audience for my exploits.

Putting the Kinky in “Kinky Librarian”

Published
by
Nadia
on July 1, 2008
in TES, edge play and random thoughts
. 0 Comments

Things have been quiet in my life lately. I saw MasterDoc briefly on Saturday morning but we just hung out. My butt is unfortunately completely bruise-free at the moment.

I had a hot thought today - if I ever engage in play piercing I *have to* have a camera handy as I want pictures of the work.

MasterDoc and I may be going to TESFest, this is not definite yet. I’m keen to go to the beginning needle play class, and the class on cutting. When I was younger I used cutting as an outlet for bad feelings, and I think it would be interesting to play with it in the controlled environment of my relationship with MasterDoc. Instead of doing it to myself under emotional duress, it would be administered to me in the context of a scene. I imagine that it might have the same cathartic effect. It’s funny, the classes that catch my eye at TESFest are all under the category of “edge play.” I haven’t ever thought of myself as an edge player, but I think I’ve moved further in that direction as my submissive journey goes on.

I hope we go to TESFest as there’s a local group of people from FetLife meeting up, and it would be cool to put faces and names to the online personas.

In the meantime, I’ve been discovering more and more kink blogs while on FetLife. I’ve added a few to my feed reader and hope to add them to my links list when I get around to it. I may only update my new site, however, as I keep hoping to move over there and leave blogspot behind. Ok, this isn’t the grand unveiling I wanted it to be (the site still doesn’t have the banner I created for the top. I’m having problems with wordpress and I’m not tech savvy enough to solve them) but the new blog site will be at kinkylibrarian.net. Yup, I’ve finally got my own kinky librarian domain like I always wanted. I’ve been mirroring the entries I have here on that site, and I uploaded my old entries a little while back. You can read the blog at either site. Eventually, however, I will move over to that one exclusively. Anyone who links to me, please update your links. Thanks.